Obnoxiously CHOMPing Chips

Yes, the above is TRULY possible.




Yesterday I had to take the train home from work, and although I thought I may have been running a little late in getting to the train station on time, I actually made it there closely approaching the 5:45pm arrival of my train.

And lo and behold, as I walked down the stairs to the platform, I saw the monitor, displaying a totally different train arriving, rather than my train.

I looked at my watch, and saw it was 5:45 on the D-O-T.

Not happy Jan.

So the train had arrived and left earlier than scheduled? That's not fair, that's like cheating! You can't have a train arrive and leave earlier than scheduled. Commuters plan their whole days around public transport, and if they miss their transport because it's left earlier, well..... GRRRR! NOT FAIR!

Yes they may leave late. That's allowed in public transport land. Just not too late. At least a late train means that commuters won't be in any danger of missing their travel appointments.

All this, plus extreme anger and frustration was what I was feeling, as I made my way to my regular spot along the platform to wait, for the next train, in 16 MINUTES.

And then 2 obnoxious nobs came along, chomping chips.

The first sign of their extreme obnoxiousness was the way they were eating their potato chips. I didn't turn to look at them, but from where they were beside me, I could hear the crunching, LOUD.

Then, Nob number 1 opened his mouth, and confirmed it all for me.

"There's so many people around, it's like a herd of cattle."

CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP.

"Notice how everyone is like, in black?"

CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP.

Only silence from his friend, as his friend was too busy CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP-ing too.

Wow Einstein. You have made the most extraordinary of observations. Yes Genius, there ARE a lot of people, maybe because it is peak hour, and it seems a train has left too early, leaving out hundreds of commuters who were counting on it to arrive on time!

And we're in black, because we have black coats, because it's winter, it's generally common, and it's freakin' depressing!

I don't know WHY I felt the need to explain myself to him in my head, but his random observations (!) were so madly pointless, that it infuriated me to the core. I almost expected him to pipe up next with "gee, look at all the train tracks, must be for some trains."

Duh. Stupid bogan.

And the CHOMP-ing. It was so annoying. Every CHOMP wound me up tighter and threw me more and more into a state of agony. I was sure they were eating, sorry, CHOMPING, with their mouths open, that's how loud it was. If I had turned my head to look at them, I'm sure I would have seen specks of chips flying out of their mouths, like cannons out of a rocket.

CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP. Like they didn't care about the late trains. Or the rain outside. Or the fact that their disgusting open-mouthed CHOMPing was rude, disrespectful and....obnoxious.

I was sooooo going to walk to another part of the platform to escape their annoying-ness, when they miraculously moved away.

Thank you.

Oh yeah, it turned out my 5:45 train hadn't arrived AT ALL, due to some technical fault. In other words, the train system is SHIT.

In the words of the Buffy/Angel-verse: Grrrrr, Argh.