Do you have a laughing hyena in your life?

Now, I must be careful, I need to bite my tongue. Up front I want to make it clear, that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being happy and enjoying a giggle.
And I'm all for positivity, and positive energy going out..... but sometimes people think their happiness is good, when really it borders on insanity.
There's this girl I know, I come across her now and then in my daily activities. There are times where I go "hmmmmm, she's not that bad," and others where I mutter "Shut the hell up."
Today is the latter day.
There's something to be said about a person who laughs hysterically at a simple remark.
You know, that type of person, when something is said and they move their whole upper torso down and back like they're convulsing?
The sort of person that you almost expect to start hiccuping, that's how out-of-control their laughing is?
But if for some reason you can't identify this kind of person (and if you can, take my advice, GET AWAY FROM THEM!) you can tell this person by the others around you.
Notice what happens when they enter a room. Do people roll their eyes? Do people make comment about their absence, and take peculiar joy in it?
Hmmmmm. Makes you think.
There's just something to be said for a person who tells you about what socks they've bought, what colour they are and when they will be worn; how they cleaned their house this morning, how long it took them, what cleaning products they used; someone that shows photos to people that don't care, while onlookers try to writhe away slowly, around the corner.....
Are you starting to get a picture??
Yes. That annoyingly, irritatingly person that drives people up the wall with their overly excitable, over-the-top, false, 'me, me, me' exterior.
Sigh.
Go away already will you?

Truth and Jealousy

I've been feeling a bit peeved off lately concerning work. There's this one little thing that's irritated me since last Friday, and now I can't stop thinking about it.
I had a conversation with a 'superior' of mine last week, there were a few others there though, so it was during a group coffee break when it happened.
One of them asked the rest of us whether we were going to a fellow colleague of ours birthday the following weekend. That fellow colleague wasn't there during the time. I didn't really hear the question because he sort of mumbled it, so when he looked at me, I asked what he'd said.
He repeated "you going to ........ birthday?"
I paused because then I realised what he was saying, and remembering that I was busy that night, replied "Oh! I have a wedding that night."
The guy joked and made some sort of comment about my ridiculously busy schedule, to which my superior added, jokingly, "Oh, excuses excuses."
Hee hee hee.
I just sort of laughed it off, and I think the conversation changed to something else. But something about it stuck with me.
That night at home I told Hubbie. He's met my superior, so he could imagine the person saying it. He may not know the person well, but he's a very good judge of character.
He told me that yes, he could imagine this person saying that. Having met this person, he could see how they would say something, in a friendly, joking way, but deep within be believing of that comment, that it was not a joke but in fact the truth.
So I was right. My superior didn't believe me. Believed that I was making up an excuse to not go to this colleague of ours birthday.
It really shitted me. And it still does. Yes, I know that every time we talk about our weekends, that my stories always include some dinner, birthday, christening, engagement, wedding or get together that I've had. I realise that normal people don't usually have a birthday and a christening on one day and then a bridal shower on the next. And I realise that my superior is probably secretly shitty because they went to my birthday and I didn't go to theirs, because of the birthday/christening day we had a few weeks back.
But you know what? Our family isn't normal. We don't have one cousin and a few uncles and aunties that we see twice a year for Christmas and Easter. We don't have family functions that include the whole family sitting on an extended stretched out table.
We have uncles and aunties that have several kids each, all of who have more kids of their own. We have our parents' cousins and family friends on top of all this. This isn't including our large group of friends, acquired through school, work and recreational activities. If you've worked in more than one place, like both Hubbie and I have, you can start to see how your group of friends suddenly becomes quite large.
If we invite everyone we know in our family to a social event, we need to hire out a RECEPTION. This is no exaggeration. We had under 400 people at our wedding. That tells you that we know a lot of people. And yes granted, a lot of those people are friends of the family that our parents had to invite only because they were once invited to their sons/daughters wedding 15 years earlier. But that's what our family is, that's what we do. The most distant relative will invite you to a function, and you're expected to do the same.
Add to that our friends, OUTSIDE of work, and you start to get a picture. Hubbie had this same issue a while back, where the guys he worked with stirred him and couldn't really believe how many functions he had, wedding after wedding, on the same weekend.
But if you think about it, what reason is there to lie? And if you were to lie, why would you make up some ridiculous excuse about having a wedding on a Saturday and then another wedding following on a Sunday? It's so far-fetched and ridiculous that it MUST be true.
We have a lot of people in our life, we are truly blessed. So, to someone that comes from a different background, with a smaller family, why should that be weird to them, why should they believe something other than the truth, why would they believe that I'm lying?
They believe this because they think I'm trying to get out of going to the work get together. Fair enough, I missed their birthday, now I'm missing this one....... it MUST mean that. Surely, you can't have that many functions, you can't have that many friends, you can't have more people in your life, and have more places to go to, and be more busy than me.........
Ahhhhhhhh. That is it. That is the answer. This person, if they wanted to, COULD believe me. If they wanted to. They COULD believe that it is possible to be that busy. But then it would mean accepting the truth that their life isn't as busy, filled with as much people and parties, as mine.
And that is the hard part to swallow. It's jealousy, as much as they don't want to admit it. Which makes me sad. I hate jealousy. I hate when I see it consuming people, little or a lot. It doesn't matter how much it is, because the end result is the same. Resentment.
So this person has disguised their jealousy and resentment with distrustfulness, because that is easier to accept. Rather than the truth. Which really peeves me off. Such a small comment, yet such a window into their mind and the way they think.
I'm a very honest person. So for someone to believe, and suggest even in a joking way, of me being manipulative and lying to get out of a situation, out of an event? Me, party person, always busy wanting to go out and do stuff?
Bull crap.
It soooooo gets to me. Like really truly. And I hate the way I'm now looking at my superior. I'm extra aware of our interactions, and just this morning when I looked up to say something, I saw them looking at me in an odd observational way. Sussing me out.
I hate it. Hate, hate, hate it. I can feel the jealousy and the scrutiny, and I need to set them straight, via my incredible subtle powers!
Because they're my superior, and I can't just come out and say it. Because of just that word. 'Superior.'
Annoying.
Sigh. Why are people so complicated?

My Karma, My Monday Night.

I had a big night on Monday. There came many realisations, tears, and after a few too many glasses of wine, acceptance and truth.
I've had a while to think about it.
I've actually had over a month to think about all the things that have been bothering me this last while. And although I blogged about my fainting episode a while back, there was an earlier episode that occurred only days before I fainted, which had me wondering whether my fainting was episodal, or karmic-al, if there is such a word.
Without going on about it too much, there was a family gathering of sorts. And someone close in the family offended me, very, very deeply.
Some could say I was right to speak up. Others may say that I was being overly sensitive, and looking too much into things. All I can say to that is, the way I have been brought up, if someone speaks in an overly condescending and arrogant way to someone else, with a continual air of attitude and self-righteousness, well they deserve to be told off.
So I spoke up to someone's negativity, and that person felt my anger.
This person has said stupid stuff before. And upset others more than they've upset me. But this time, after this night, I could not let it go. I was beyond mad. I was seething with anger, my blood was boiling and tears threatened to spill out every time I even thought of saying their name.
I was starting to feel that I could NEVER get over this. Ever. When you look at it, you may say to yourself "but it wasn't even that bad." But the culmination of receiving this attitude over the years, and the way it was put on the night, was as they say, the straw that broke the camels back. And it snapped me in half.
It placed stress on me. Very heavily, because everytime I thought of this person, or they were mentioned, a sarcastic smile would cross my face. I was mad.
It didn't threaten, but it did make things difficult between Hubbie and I. We had various heated talks. Heated because although he saw where I was coming from, he had been himself in my position so many times, and felt the anger himself, that he knew it was pointless. He claimed, that despite some of the negativity put out by this person, behind the flamboyant mouth lay a good-intentioned person.
I just couldn't accept that. I do not believe that a person should get a green card to do certain things which are normally deemed inappropriate, purely because overall "their heart is in the right place." This boils me to my core. It is absolutely ludicrous that someone should be let off the hook, and allowed to treat people disrespectfully, I don't care how good their intentions are.
In and out, in and out. The argument, all that was said, all the possible FUTURE disagreements..... this was going in and out of my head for weeks. And during this time, I fainted. I don't know if it was my increased sense of awareness due to my sudden intense and underlying anger, but I found myself constantly "accidentally" knocking into things at home, hitting myself, my arm, my leg, my toe, etc, etc.
I became increasingly aware of my foul language. Every sentence was "f, f, f..." and it wasn't even angry talk when I said it. It was being used as a word when there was absolutely no neccessary need to insert it in the sentence. However I did something good here: I started a swear jar, and in 4 to 5 days my swearing had significantly dropped. So that I was proud of.
But everything else.... I just felt as if I was bad. Things were going bad. And on Monday afternoon, driving home from work, I could have quite easily been wiped off the road. In a second. It wasn't even my fault, and the idiot driver could have removed me from the road indefinitely, and he didn't even look up to acknowledge his mistake.
That really stirred me. Shook me up a bit, in a day where there were countless things that seemed to be weighing on me. Future financial issues, (how are we gonna pay for all our new house items and renovations, and get that new car, and save for an investment and somehow live in our dream home one day?) worried about people close to me, (why do they keep doing this, I want to save them, help them, get them out of this cycle of bad decisions) and then THAT incident, the angry confrontation that every time I thought of it made me frown, quite literally.
I was seriously feeling low. Not only because of what had been occurring in my life, and all the worries that plagued my mind, but low because I was seeing everything that had recently happened in my life, as a cycle.
As Karma.
A cycle that had begun at around the time of that disappointing weekend, when I'd spoken up to some unreasonable behaviour.
This was something I just couldn't fathom, I couldn't grasp. I held such a strong belief in karma, belief in the balance of negative and positive energies, belief that what you put out you get back. So then why should I be receiving any negativity in my life, when I've done nothing wrong?
The way I believe in God, and my Faith, that's the same way I look at Karma. I just know it. I know it exists, and there is no need for hard evidence to determine its existence, because I see it in other peoples lives and in my life. So to believe so strongly in something, and then start to question IT, question YOURSELF, because suddenly, Karma is rearing its ugly head at YOU. But you're not bad.................. right..... ?
That's a scary thing. When you believe something so strongly, and something happens to make you question it. The feeling inside you is lost. You don't know what to believe, what to think, because suddenly, one of your very basic morals and rules of existence, seems shattered.
But then you start to think... If it's not your principle belief that is wrong, what does that say about me? Am I wrong? Why is Karma treating me so bad, making these things happen, when I believe in IT! I believe in it with every part of me that is in this world....
And that is what hurts. Much like unrequited love or affections, when you love someone and that someone doesn't give you the same love back. You believe in Karma, but karma isn't giving you a break.
So, after a tearful preparation of dinner, with my accusations at Hubbie that "he doesn't understand," and "you're not listening," we ate dinner. Poured a few glasses of wine.
And began to talk. I said everything. I told him my future worries, present fears, past angers, and finally admitted that I was scared. Was my intense anger, that I held deep within me, towards that family member, the catalyst that triggered the karmic wave of negativity towards me? I was putting out negative energy, so therefore I was receiving it back?
But how can that be, when all I did that night was speak up! Yes, speak up...... but my problem thereafter was that I held on to my anger, when I should've let it go. The air of negativity around me when I spoke that person's name, or thought of them, could have been cut with a knife.
Things started to look better on my second glass of wine.
Karma hadn't done anything to me, nor would it ever do anything to me. It was simply reacting to what I put out. I was the one that had created the negative cycle, and despite my unwavering belief, I should have known that not even I, believer of all Karmic energies, would be resistant to its power.
So, I had not done wrong, but I had put out bad energy, very bad. And karma was only responding to that. It had nothing to do with me as a person, and everything to do with my actions and intentions.
Which is reassuring. If you think about it, good people and bad people don't exist. It's their actions and what they put out to the world that create their 'bad' or 'good' personas. So no matter who you are, whether you're overall 'bad' in your intentions or 'good,' Karma's energy force will balance you out.
Not to say that you can easily pigeonhole people into two groups: that is in itself an entirely different blog. But for these purposes, you can categorise people according to their intentions.
On to my third glass of wine and I was a happy chappy. All was well in my world again. I wasn't going to let go of my anger straight away, even overnight. But I was going to try. And I was going to have to try and suppress my strong desire to let people know they're wrong when they're wrong, especially when it came to this person. I was gonna let it all go, because you know what?
Karma gets you in the end. And that's the way it should be.
Cheers to balance in this world.

I finished New Moon!!!!

Just thought I'd share that with you all :)

Now I have a dilemma. It's about 5 weeks until I see the midnight premiere of the movie at the cinemas with some friends. Ideally I'd like to start reading Eclipse after I've watched New Moon. But apparently, as filming has already begun on Eclipse, and spoilers are being released, I'm worried that I'll accidentally become exposed to something before I read it! So I need to spend the next few weeks aggressively avoiding magazines and the internet, which will be VERY hard especially with the net. I check my daily news on the net!
How am I supposed to avert my eyes when I see Rob Pattinson, that's impossible! I'll go "mmmm that's Rob," and then BANG! the Eclipse spoiler will hit me.
Ahhhhhh!
But I'll do it. For the love of the Twilight series, damn it I'll try!
As soon as I see New Moon, I absoultely have to get through the last 2 books pronto!

Children of the 80s rejoice!!!!

Oh wow did I make a fabulous discovery yesterday! So many years of searching, searching... and now I have my long-awaited answer. Ahhhh, the beauty of the internet....

But first, to how I made my wonderful discovery. Another day at work, another day bored, wanting something interesting to do. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but things are slow at the moment, and I find myself constantly looking for things to occupy me which are non work-related.
So I went into my "Fun" folder. Now, EVERYONE who has a desk job absolutely has to have a "Fun" folder, it's where you put those funny emails for future retrieval and laughs, those wacky websites, it's just a folder for all your random crap that you wanna keep. It is definitely NOT work related, it is very random, and very necessary.
I clicked onto an email that contained a link to a TV Themes website, thinking I would just browse through and listen to random TV themes: hey, this site is huge, it has EVERYTHING, I don't think there's something it doesn't have.
So here I am, browsing....browsing.... and then a thought strikes me. Not a new thought, it's something I've often wondered over the past 10 or so years, when something old-school has reminded me of it. Looking at this TV theme shows, scrolling down over shows from the 70s, 80s, 90s..... I asked myself
"what is the name of the show I used to love to watch as a kid?"
This question has posed a problem to me many times. I don't know what this show is called, but I know it was a US show, where a group of kids/teens acted out various skits in a parody style program, and the show would end with a 15 minute crime show, whereby by the end of the week after 5 episodes, the crime would be solved.
I've asked my friends, posted on facebook, asking about this show, whether anyone at all would remember it, but to no avail. My friends remember T-Bag (wasn't that just the best?!) but although I watched that show at around the same age, and the same time in the morning (I think they even followed each other) my friends would have no idea what I'm talking about. They look at me like... "okkkaaaaayyyyyy...."
Damn it, it's real! I didn't dream it.
So I decided to go on a proper hunt. Hey, bored at work, nothing to do? It seemed like a fabulous idea, one I could dedicate myself to for at least half an hour before I started feeling guilty about my lack of work productivity.
I googled 'kids 80s tv shows' or something along those lines, and came up with a few good sites, one listing the old school Saturday morning schedules, others listing in general shows from various decades. That's all well and good, but this show was on during the week.
I came across a site that seemed to be a blog, where the blogger had listed their fave shows as a kid growing up in the 80s, and then a multitude of people had responded by adding in their faves. This was hilarious to read.
Clearly there are a lot of people out there like me, who are keen to get to the bottom of what show they loved as a kid but can't remember. And they were all there on this blog, commenting on their faves but more often begging others for any info on their fave shows as a kid by trying to describe what it was all about.
HILARIOUS. Really. You get this group of people together in a room and get them to swap stories, and you'll start to think that they were all on acid trips as a kid.
Fantastic lines EVERYWHERE, from people asking for info on robotic sheriffs on robotic horses, hippo chick and frog people in costumes dancing around, bears with flying horses, kids in a bus with an old man looking for salamanders, a green-faced curly-haired witch named Grotbag, boys sucked into Nintendo games, a Cecil character with a tubular nose that lived in a forest, fighting colours, mini-me doll land..... oh my gosh I could go on FOREVER!
Honestly do yourself a favour and read it: http://blogs.warwick.ac.uk/jjameson/entry/cool_80s_cartoons/
After amusing myself there, I saw a link that one of these bloggers posted about checking out the site "Retrojunk," as so many people were desperate to find their fave shows.
So I jumped on there. And started to scroll.
I didn't even know what I was looking for. I had a feeling that if I saw the title, I might recognise it. I needed a title that represented my search: a group of kid teens acting out in various funny sketches, things like game shows, canteen scenarios at school, etc, ending with a 15 minute crime show.
Now I sound like the one on the acid trip. Hey, at least there were no flying bears on horses.
So, scrolling, scrolling, occassionally clicking on a random show to see if it was the one.
Then, I came across IT.
SQUARE ONE TV.
I froze. Because I realised this was it. And when I clicked on the accompanying link, saw the program photo, and read a few lines, I knew I was right. Described as a series "dedicated to making math fun, " it included "pop-culture parodies, great music, excellent skits and so much more."
That's right!
I'm so glad I found it! My on-again, off-again, intermittent 10 year or so search has come to an end.
Now that I have a name to the memory, people can't raise their eyebrows at me anymore.
It is pretty quiet today at work...... I think I'll do a youtube search...... :)

Sun is shining.... the weather is sweet....

Oh what a gorgeous day it is today. Real spring weather, it is. Although this whole week has been a repeat of our brilliantly freezing icy cold winter, and there are a few remnants of that season in our evenings and mornings, I've just come back to work from morning tea outside, and oh my gosh. The sun is blinding. The sky is blue without a cloud in the sky.
Think of all the cliches, and that's what today is. Perfect :)
My body is aching to be out of this place, to experience the crisp spring air, bathe in the warm sun, sit and finish my New Moon..... LOL
Speaking of, I've been reading a chapter each night, in order to get through the book before it comes out in the cinemas. Which is an easy feat as 1) it's not hard to read when you're obsessed with the story and 2) I'm up to the last chapter before the epilogue, and seeing as the movie is released over a month from now, it will be done by then.
But last night my parents visited, and we all talked and watched Hey Hey's reunion on TV.
Harry Connick Jr and Jackson 5 wannabees??? That's a WHOLE different blog.
But by the time they left I didn't wanna rush my reading experience and so I left it for one night.
And going to bed I felt..... incomplete. It sounds soooo silly, I even feel like an idiot writing it, but because I've been doing a chapter a night, and when you read, you're playing out the scenarios in your mind and seeing them like a show, it almost becomes LIKE a show you're watching, and I was left thinking "Hmmmm, I wonder what happened to Bella and Edward tonight?" Yes, that makes NO sense, since I am the one in charge of running the show, but still it left me going... "must.... read..... every.... night."
LOL
Obsession with New Moon. And I just KNOW there are those out there who will be like "You're still reading New Moon?"
My retort to them is: Try planning the wedding of the decade, work full-time and research EVERYTHING wedding related, go on a European non-stop sight-seeing holiday for 5 weeks after that, come back to an empty house and start the process of refurbishing your new home with everything from furniture to furnishings and dishes and everything in between, constantly try to move things over from your parents home and find spots to put them in (WHEN THERE IS LIMITED STORAGE SPACE) go through the month of August which is filled with not only your birthday but EVERYONE IN YOUR LIFE YOU KNOW (many parents have had fun during the Christmas periods) be invited everywhere and have people constantly coming over to your house because they want to catch up with you after your wedding/holiday, and on top of that maintain a clean spotless home, cooking and organising.
What's that I hear? Hmmmm, right. Silence.
'Nuf said.
Go New Moon!

Bridal Shower presents and Matron-of-Honour stuff....

Well the conclusion to my whole "will there or won't there be an appropriately priced gift left on the bridal shower registry" saga is, YES, there was a few gifts left!
I put a few items together, to add up to the approximate total that my bestie and I were intending on spending... and pleasantly enough when I purchased the items they were LESS than I thought. However our sister's friend, the recipient, won't know we got the items on sale, and will assume we got them at full price.
Cool, huh? Yet I still feel slightly guilty, thinking, "oh gee, if only she knew!"
The other bit of information that put me in a super-duper GREASH FLANTASTIC mood yesterday afternoon was a conversation that occurred with my bestie during the bridal shower.
We were much too wrapped up in talk of watching the midnight premiere of New Moon at the cinemas when it comes out, as well as random offerings of wedding talk on her part, which is nothing surprising, seeing as a lot of close family and friends suspect she will get engaged soon, only how soon we don't know. And her boyfriend is constantly hinting at things, like engagement rings and proposals, but simultaneously promising her that he will shock her with the way he does it.
So in amongst all this wedding talk, of what style of ring she wants, and what colour dresses her bridal party will have (ah, such girls, planning weddings that don't even have a set date yet! - royal purple, by the way :) )she told me that because I'm married, rather than put me as a bridesmaid and have me paired up with a guy when I already have a hubbie, she's going to place me as matron-of-honour!
I was soooo excited! But a bit unsure of what to say. I mean, it's not an official invitation yet, because she isn't getting married, but then again it's a promise of what's to come, and what's to come looks awesome!
I've only been flower girl before, so the thought of being an ADULT in a grown up bridal party role, that I will be able to remember (when you're a kid things just wizz by you) is super-exciting! But I can't get too excited, I wanna save it for when the day really comes.
But I'm also so touched. I mean, with the family and friends that I have around me, a lot of them don't generally do the matron-of-honour thing, just because it's not customary in their religion/tradition. My sister had one for her wedding. And I just recently had my sister as MY matron-of-honour, because she was married and I so desperately wanted her part of my big day, in an official way. However, I know how it is, because there were some amongst my entourage that questioned my choice, wondering why you would have a married woman in your bridal party, simply assuming that bridal parties were only for unmarried people. When you need to explain to someone the role of a matron-of-honour, especially in our modern day and age, it feels like we haven't moved forward much in society and the world as a whole. Some people are that closed-minded that they don't see the world for all the possibilities out there, rather they assume that what they know and what they have lived is the only way. And that shits me. And shitted me, mostly during my getting-married period.
So I know it may be similar for my bestie. My experience may be similar to hers when she begins planning her wedding. And despite that, she is still willing to create a 'role' for me, despite how unorthodox it may be in her traditions, and despite the questions she may receive. That's how much she wants me as a part of her day.
Now that's what you call friendship :)
Now I just need her boyfriend to propose soon. I wanna be a matron-of-honour!

The best laughs come out of your husband doing the grocery shopping!

Hahahahahaha, I'm still laughing and I've got a bad case of the giggles.
I'm making two cakes over tonight and tomorrow morning, to bring to a 1st birthday and a christening that hubbie and I are going to tomorrow.
He has the day off today so I wrote him a list of items I need to make my cakes.
LOL
He just called me only minutes ago, asking "I can't find the ..... dis-in-te-grated coconut."
Oh my gosh, kill me with laughter. I corrected him and said "dessicated coconut" giggling slightly, and helping him through the rest of the list, by telling him which aisle would most likely have what.
Again, when he tried to read my shopping list he said "disintegrated," and as he was looking then for shredded coconut, another type I need for my recipe, and looking at all the different styles they had, he was reading them out to me again, and AGAIN said "disintegrated coconut," after I'd kept correcting him.
Laughter central, I can not stop giggling!
Disintegrated.... LOL. If it was disintegrated there would be nothing there!
Hahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha
What a fantastic way to spend your Friday morning at work, laughing at your hubbie!!!!

The Art of Recycling your Gifts

I have a bridal shower on the weekend. It's one of my closest friends sister who is getting married, and although I knew from over a month ago that I was attending the shower, I've failed to do the one thing I swore that I would do immediately: that is, buy a gift from the registry.
I know how these things go. Hey, I've gone through it myself just recently. When you're having a shower prior to your wedding, and you've set up a registry in order to receive gifts that you and your partner want, and to ease the buying angst for your guests, you still end up with countless problems.
How many presents should I place on the registry?
How much should they be priced?
Should I put more expensive items, or more cheaper items?
What if I can't find any normal priced items I want?
What's normal??????????????
AHHHH! So glad it's over for me. And then you have people, calling you up and saying "what should I get you?"
Um. The registry. Look on it. I've made a registry, because..... I want those items. Duh.
But their excuse is "I've had a look and there's nothing good."
Hmmmmm. Nothing good. To them, apparently, there's nothing good, but they fail to realise that if it's on the list, it must be what you want. So that tells me it's something else all together.
It's nothing to do with their approval of the products you've placed on your list. It's all about the right price. No one is actually willing to say that bit, but if the price fits, then the present is GREAT. Your relationship suddenly gets a price tag. What they feel about you is reduced to a price: the mental map of it goes something like this.....
"So she's my friend, but I don't see her often.... but I have known her for 10 years, and she's funny, yeah I like her...... what did she get me for my birthday last year..... oh right I didn't call her..... hmmmm.... I'll spend $50 bucks."
And everyone does it. Which is why yuor closest spend the highest amounts, and the not so lose spend.....moderate amounts.
Which leads me to today. The shower is on Sunday, and today after work I'm planning on going straight to the store to check out the registry. I was messaging my best friend this morning on the way to work (not the one whose sister is getting married) and she was asking me if I've bought anything for the shower yet. She said she had a look at the registry and that there's not much there (!) and there's only really expensive items.
ALERT ALERT ALERT went off in my head. Oh no. Now I'm one of those people. Left desperate and present-less only days before the shower. I suggested we all chip in together to buy an expensive present, and she agreed, saying her own sister will be chipping in too. Which leaves me praying really hard that tonight I find an "appropriate present" one that's GREAT! (= the correct $$$$$)
But then a thought came to my head. What if the only presents left were as my bestie had said, "really expensive?" I couldn't justify spending a huge amount, likewise I don't think I could convince my friends to help me out with the present if it was too much. She IS our bestie's sister. But exactly that, HER sister. She's not our bestie. And you need to keep money for yourself. Thngs are expensive, and ....... Yes I know excuses, excuses. Now I'M the one placing a price tag on our relationship.
Then I remembered. My wedding presents.
I know, I feel bad. Just the thought of re-wrapping presents I received for my wedding makes me feel bad, let alone doing it, but for our wedding, we got a few things that we'd already received at my bridal shower. These were from people who weren't at my shower clearly, so they weren't to know that I'd already received like-presents.
What I can picture right now in my head is The Blender. A good brand, modern blender, that we received as a wedding gift. When in fact we'd already received a blender, one we picked out ourselves for my shower.
We have two great blenders. One open, out of the box, and one still packaged up, the one which is THE double.
And I'm thinking....... maybe the the double blender.... being the double and everything... and being totally GREAT..... would be valued at the about price.... we were thinking of spending.... and being a wedding present.... my friends sister the maybe-recipient of the double blender.... wouldn't have seen it at the shower because we're not giving away the shower blender, we're giving away the double!
Ok, that just assumes we ARE giving it when in fact I haven't even concurred with my bestie, and I haven't even seen yet what is part of the registry. But what if we just give her the blender? We would save money, in fact we'd save all our money because we wouldn't be spending any on a gift!
But the question arises: does she want a blender? That blender in particular? The variety of choices these days leaves one open to a multitude of possibilities.
And what if, shock horror, she already chose a blender for her registry, it has been purchased, and because of it's purchased-ness, the registry fails to show it.... and we turn up with a........ double blender for her.
And a year from now she'll be in my situation. Late in buying a bridal shower present, and contemplating giving my double-blender which is now HER double-blender (would that make it a triple blender?) to some unsuspecting triple blender receiver.
The cycle of blender-ness. Hey, it's not that bad. It could be a toaster.